Conflict Resolution

Trust

It is the foundation on which all relationships are based. Without, it is like shifting sand. It is hard work requiring sacrifice, self-disclosure and risk taking.

Discovery

Trust starts by not only teaching others about ourselves, but also by looking through someone else’s eyes. We must make it a point to learn about each other. What makes the other person tick; what is their motivation; what are their expectations; what hurts them.

End in Mind

If you really want to resolve a conflict, you must consider what is that both sides want or need. What is the goal of the disagreement? First know what each person wants, then you can concentrate on resolving that issue rather than "pulling in the kitchen sink".

Interdependency

Trust also depends on the realization that we need each other. We learn that we need each other after we share our hopes and fears, appreciate others’ hopes and fears, and realize each others’ needs. If we realize that we need each other (and accept it), the conflict will be easier to resolve.

Cohesiveness

Sharing, knowing the other person, realizing both common and differing goals, and accepting an interdependent relationship creates a synergistic bond. You come to see this bond as an investment worthy of protecting and maintaining. No conflict is stronger than the bond.

Full Circle

With these building blocks, trust begins to grow. With trust, the walls can fall, but the foundation will remain. This foundation is dependant upon our being able to trust and being trustworthy. Both sides of a conflict must be invested in this trust in order to successfully and productively resolve conflict.